Wow. Very cool. Thanks, pillow guy.
By - FreshPickle89
Thank you for submitting to r/ParlerWatch!
Please take the time to review the comments and [submission rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ParlerWatch/about/rules) of this subreddit. It's important that everyone understands that, although the content submitted to r/ParlerWatch can be violent and hateful in nature, the users in this subreddit are held to a higher standard.
In general, be courteous to others. Debate/discuss/argue the merits of ideas, **don't attack people. Personal insults, shill or troll accusations, hate speech, any advocating, celebrating or wishing death/physical harm, posting personal information that's not publicly available, and other rule violations can result in a permanent ban.**
Blacklisted urls and even mentions of certain sites are automatically removed. The most common of these are PatriotsDaughtWin and DonaldDaughtWin.
If you see comments in violation of our rules, or submissions that don't adhere to the content guidelines, please report them.
**JOIN PARLERWATCH'S [DISCORD!](https://discord.gg/JbbC6mV3Gg)**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ParlerWatch) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>Trump won every state except NY
*laughs in connecticut*
We're a democratic supermajority. Trump didn't win shit over here.
Not to mention California, Maryland, Illinois, etc. If they are going to lie, at least make the lies slightly believable.
No shit, they're going full blown North Korea-style "Dear Leader" over there in PillowPantsLand
Lindell also believes Trump gets 18 holes in one every time he plays golf
I bet if someone told him that Trump's shit tastes like chocolate he'd eat a bowl full of it.
I bet he’d still eat it even if he knew in advance it tasted like regular shit, and _he’d tell you_ that it tasted amazing.
Eating turds to own the libs, with a shit-eating grin and a head full of fibs.
That sounds like lyrics to a *Brand New* song
The Shitty Things that Noone Ever Knows
Nah he'd commission a convincing bowl of rocky road and then tell you he's eating Trump's actual shit and that it is the most amazing thing ever.
Then sell you knockoff trump feces
No, much like Dear Leader Kim, Eternal President Trump does not defecate. Everything he eats is perfectly transformed into muscles and his glorious full head of hair.
He sure is wasting a lot of money on diapers then.
I'm sure that's already happened.
There's no way to kiss that much ass without eating at least a little shit.
He would do that anyway.
Trump once finished 18 holes of golf in **15 strokes**
please don't associate this fuckstain with Minnesota. We are blue and pretty legit here for the most part
I swear if you guys elect this maniac to Governor, I will never forgive you, Minnesota!
I assure you there is no chance.
I believed in zero chances before.
Before was 2016
Minnesota will never elect Lindell. He's too bat shit even by rural standards. The Twin Cities and Duluth would go against him and that decides the whole state, it's the whole reason we're consistently blue.
I legitimately hope you're right.
I would also love to see the highest participation rates there to help prevent you being wrong
This last election has shown us the stark divide between rural and urban voters. I can't imagine that's solely a Trump thing, more like a snowball effect. But yes voter participation and getting young voters involved is going to be key in elections from here on out. But I'm confident in the numbers for Minnesota at least.
Jesse Ventura would like a word.
>No shit, they're going full blown North Korea-style "Dear Leader" over there in PillowPantsLand
Next they will announce that Trump hit 11 holes in one in a row and doesn't poop.
"you know about PillowPants too?!?"
Like Biden wouldn't win his home state of Delaware
Exactly lol and Delaware is very much a blue state
And have they met Vermont?
There is no universe in which a state that would elect Bernie Sanders would also elect Trump.
I always love when a nominee doesn't win their own state. Much like Trump didn't win his home state of NY at the time. Should tell the broader electorate something about that person's character.
At this point these folks are just making shit up. Like they can't genuinely believe this shit right??
At this point might as well say Trump got 130 million votes and Biden got 4 million. And the 4 million he did get were entirely illegal voter fraud.
Oh, so like what Trump said in 2016.
And out of those 4million votes, 3.5million of them had “from the desk of Donald Trump” watermarked at the top! It was was such a landslide, trump voted a few million times for Biden out of pity.
The pillow-pimp thinks trumpholio won Minnesota, HA!
The thought of Cali EVER going red again is laughable. I just don't understand how one could be that naive.
If you are going for the Big Lie, then go for the **BIG LIE**
"...and thus in the primitive simplicity of their minds they more readily fall victims to the big lie than the small lie, since they themselves often tell small lies in little matters but would be ashamed to resort to large-scale falsehoods"
The Hitler comparisons are officially no longer funny, they're just straight up chilling now.
>"The phrase "big lie" was also used in a report prepared during the war by the United States Office of Strategic Services in describing Hitler's psychological profile:\[11\]
>His primary rules were: never allow the public to cool off; never admit a fault or wrong; never concede that there may be some good in your enemy; never leave room for alternatives; never accept blame; concentrate on one enemy at a time and blame him for everything that goes wrong; people will believe a big lie sooner than a little one; and if you repeat it frequently enough people will sooner or later believe it. (CIA)\[12\]"
>The above quote appears in the report, A Psychological Analysis of Adolph Hitler: His Life and Legend, by Walter C. Langer,\[12\]\[13\] which is available from the US National Archives.\[14\] A somewhat similar quote appears in Analysis of the Personality of Adolph Hitler: With Predictions of His Future Behaviour and Suggestions for Dealing with Him Now and After Germany's Surrender, by Henry A. Murray, October 1943:\[15\]
>Never to admit a fault or wrong; never to accept blame; concentrate on one enemy at a time; blame that enemy for everything that goes wrong; take advantage of every opportunity to raise a political whirlwind.
Even Mark Milley is said to have compared Trump's last days of preaching the gospel of the Fuhrer... this is exactly what he meant. Thank fuck we have Mark Milley as head of our joint chiefs
He also said (according to the forthcoming book that everyone has been quoting this week) that he saw Trump’s election horseshit as a possible “Reichstag moment,” and he was right.
If you watch the PBS series *Rise Of the Nazis*, you'll find that there are many stories that sound as though they could be about the rise of the GQP and Trump. It's terrifying, honestly.
I went to the Holocaust museum in DC this summer and they play a ton of Hitler's speeches. It's absolutely astonishing the similarities between him and Trump. Shows that it just takes one lunatic and a riled up base to overthrow an entire system.
The scary part is how far Trump got considering how ignorant he is. Imagine if someone else with more intelligence did it. It's only a matter of time before we get someone like Trump who is smart and evil, and will rile up a group like Trump did on Jan. 6, and actually walk with them to the capital instead of hiding. How many cops would have stood in the way to bar the president from entering the chambers?
Jesus came down from Heaven and joined with Elvis in Memphis to endorse Trump as world emperor for eternity?
That’s stolen directly from Mike Pillow’s dream-life.
Because California would soooo have preferred more Trump.
Lol I love it when they act like CA was ever going red. Just because the trumpers came down to LA and beat up black people (seriously, fuck them, they caused so much havoc and damage here just because they can't handle being the minority), does not mean we will ever let them take our state.
Watching them scream at minorities for years, say oh no you arent treated horribly, and then do this when their power is threatened, is so fucking telling.
Bonus points for pillow guy's 'facts' without any valid citations. I guess we are just supposed to take his word as an expert on repackaging foam waste into $50 dollar pillows.
Don't forget, ya know, California.
and we hate him in maine, except the hillbillies in northern maine lol
I think the only Republicans I saw in my time in Maine recently (Bar Harbor) were tourists
Why can't Mainers figure out how to get a better senator?
We tried but the hillbillies re-elected her. I voted for her opponent lol
Living in Portland, Oregon, I'm sitting here giggling.
Sitting here 3 hours north of you laughing my ass off. King County is so blue that the the rest of the state can't even turn it purple. Washington is awesome.
🤝 yes it is.
Sitting in Illinois and giggling as well because legal weed is awesome and these people... Are the reason I'm glad weed is legal.
Yeah no republican is winning WA either. They gotta suffer Seattle.
King County is so blue it doesn't matter what the rest of the state does.
Shit man even the bigger cities in other countries can lean blue. Bellingham goes blue up north, and south has Olympia.
I am in Snohomish County and they are blue as well. My point was that there is no way trump won WA even if all other countries would have gone red.
You are not wrong. I love this state.
If he's gonna lie so obviously, I can't figure out why he decided to give NY to Biden. This pillow monger wants us to believe Trump won D.C., so he's obviously not concerned about plausibility. 😆
"An F turns into a B so easily, but you got greedy." ~Homer, to Bart, after Bart altered his report card.
"NYC liberal elitists" despite the fact that Trump is a NYC real estate mogul lol.
Mile Lindell owes me $47million. Confirmed fact!
(Is this how it works?)
Yes. This is apparently how things work now. Congratulations, Mr. Millionaire!
Don’t spend it all in one place.
it depends. are your sources excellent?
Confirmed, I’m a source, and I am excellent. People tell me “Sir, how are you such an excellent source? We’ve never seen anything like it.”
if that is the case, there is really no other option but to believe you.
He didn't win fucking Georgia.
I think this just shut off their brains. Georgia flipped blue, and the Republican Party collectively said “what”? And soon after came the election fraud conspiracies. Because there’s “no possible way” Georgia flipped, because *everyone* loves Trump, right? That’s when many of them realized that they haven’t been speaking to their base, but to a very vocal minority of extremists. Rather than backpedal, they doubled down. Because that vocal minority is pulling along the rest of the Republican voters, who just vote because it’s “their side”.
This is seriously starting to get scary. We might have a true insurrection soon.
The thing is that theyre not contesting the Senate election though. So they accept that its feasible the Senate elections couldve flipped but that it must be fraud if the Presidential vote had flipped...
Well, Trump *has* said a time or two that David Perdue will be reinstated to the Senate when he’s reinstated to the presidency...
Newt Gingrich was on Fox News insinuating the Georgia senate results were fraudulent the very next day. It was a quick statement, but it was there.
I'm so disappointed that fucker is still alive.
This is how cults of personality work, nothing matters but the figurehead.
Everything else can fall by the way side.
Shocker that mobilizing black voters in droves turned Georgia blue.
Even less shocking that when it happened they immediately sat down and thought "okay how can we stop those people from voting like that again?"
> Georgia flipped blue, and the Republican Party collectively said “what”?
Which is funny, because that writing was on the wall from the first week of early voting.
> “Are you seeing the same thing I’m seeing?” asked one Republican strategist in Georgia who spoke on the condition of anonymity to speak candidly, when shown the numbers. “This state is blue.”
[Across the country, Democratic enthusiasm is propelling an enormous wave of early voting](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/early-voting-2020-election/2020/10/14/500c22ce-0d90-11eb-8a35-237ef1eb2ef7_story.html)
And after all the shit he talked about McCain and Mike Kelly was it any surprise to anyone outside of his cult that it turned blue? Good lord
It's not even just Trump. Every state legislator who won lines up perfectly with the political climate where you have nut cases like Greene and Gatez who won, and other disliked R's were voted out. Why would the democrats cheat and give themselves a slim majority and a biden presidency instead of cheating and giving them a super majority?
How does anyone think they actually had fake or duplicate ballots that went for biden but not for any other politican? Wouldn't everyone on the ballot also have gotten extra votes? So if there was a major fuck up like they said then maybe some democrats also won places no? The entire conspiracy is flawed.
If you try and talk through the logistics with these people they shut down and move on. Anything outside of "Trump won, biden got fake votes" just disappears and they lose interest, while still saying the same shit.
If democrats did cheat then show me how they cheated. Show me the numbers on how the duplicate ballots impacted everyone else on the ballot. If there is irregularities in the president then obviously there are irregularities on everyone else. Unless they just put blank ballots with only bidens name on them...which at that point should be easy to prove. If you can't show me that, and so far no one can...then stfu about it
> Show me the numbers on how the duplicate ballots impacted everyone else on the ballot.
Exactly this. As a dearly departed friend and mentor liked to say, "They can argue with you until they're blue in the face, but they can't argue with the data."
I think you guys have the same problem we (UK) do. Society has been becoming more 'progressive' over time. The right's traditional voter base is shrinking and both the Republicans and the Conservative Party have had to deliberately court the extremist vote and try to manufacture as much fear and division as possible. Even that is not enough to win a true majority, so the fiddling and lying get wilder and wilder.
It's worrying for sure.
*high fives in Georgian*
Vermonter here. We’ve routinely vote in the most liberal guy I could think of, and this dude thinks we all voted for Trump.
I would move out of Massachusetts if he won here.
Ha! I moved out of Massachusetts anyway! Because I don't have much money! Ha! Gotem
_Laughs in the Democratic bastion of California._
It is kind of funny that even Crack Pillow doesn't believe Trump could win his home state.
Would have been more believable if they conceded California as the only win. Tucker could have ran with that as plausible.
NJ chuckles with you
Laughs in NJ.
Hawaii and DC have *never* voted Republican since gaining Electoral College votes in the 60s. (And DC always has 85%+ Dem). And they start now? (Although it looks like Pillow Guy forgot to mention DC at all in his tally, not even accounted for!).
And it’s funny that he mentions how many votes he supposedly got but not how many Electoral College votes he supposedly got. Cause popular vote doesn’t mean squat *cough*2016*cough*
Hawaii voted for Nixon in 72 and Reagan in 84
If there was only one state that Joe won, it would be Minnesota. We have the longest track record of voting for democratic presidential candidates.
Massachusetts over here….definitely didn’t win us. Maybe our creepy neighbor to the north, NH, but definitely not us.
That’s how you know they are truly insane and not just pushing agenda that they know to not be true.
No one of sound mind could possibly suggest that Trump had the largest margin of victory in modern US election history.
He's not looking to appeal to sound minds. He's throwing idiocy biscuits to the under-educated and the insane.
I think Pillowman believes this shit. Dudes looney toons.
Oh yeah. He's batshit crazy. MyBreakdown is his new brand.
Probably back on the rock too.
Crack heads might not come up with anything that batshit insane.
Oh I agree, I just also believe that he’s one of the idiots who believe it
Truly baffling how the President that never had an approval rating above 50% could lose the popular vote.
If you don't see the obvious fraud here, I can't help you.^^^^/s
“And then everybody laughed.”
These people believe he is (was) the second coming of Ronald Reagan. He’s done everything he possibly could to emulate him.
TIL: Computers in 2021 shut down if they try to count up to 103 million
Y2K21 bug. It’s a thing. Confirmed and this is Absolute Truth.
Is Initech on it? Because they are the go to source for Y2K variant bugs, even after that fire.
Mmm. Yeahhh. Did you *see*… the memo… about this?
You know, we lost a few people this week and I’m going to need you to come in on Saturday.
Oh, is that my stapler? Thanks!
It's a well known fact about computers, if there's one thing they're bad at, it's addition.
Horrible, completely useless for math computers are.
Hilarious comment, well done. As a professional software developer, allow me to observe that a signed 32-bit integer can count to 2,147,483,648 (two *billion* and some change...) before running into trouble. In fact, there's enough "change" there to easily accommodate 103 million votes.
Lindell's a clown. Not a funny clown, but a clown.
Unsigned integers? That sounds like illegal immigrant speak, brother. If you bring your voter ID to the booth and it's not **signed**, your ballot's going in the **trash!** Take your bits and bytes and boops back to your own country!!! SPEAK ENGILSH
Those poor exhausted if statements just needed a rest.
If you're gonna lie at least make it believable
I believe that he believes it
The bigger the lie, the better.
It's all part of their fun. Trying to 'out-idiot' eachother. It's just that none of them want to be the ones to end the game, so the bar has been lowered THAT far down. So low, it's hard to even tell what they genuinely believe anymore. Probably irrelevent, since they've proven very willing to keep playing their games, keep lowering that bar of theirs for as long as it grants them the only social status that they will ever hold....even when it's just all in their heads.
It’s actually more akin to the Nigerian scammer route - those typos and poor grammar arent by accident. They could easily pay some English speaking person $10 to edit their script one time before sending it to millions.
They leave them in on purpose to weed out those who are already too smart to fall for such a scam. That was never their target audience so losing them is actually a positive as it boils down to only those who would actually fall for something like that are left.
Same with this post the OP showed us. The people making it don’t want the 99% who know it’s BS, they want the 1% who are easily fooled to come across it and start believing it, then parroting it in an attempt to find another 1/100 fool to recruit, and so on and so on...
Or go further. 37 million? Why not 5 million?
I hate that he's associated with MN.
Hey now, its better than Tomi Lahren, the rational of us in SD regret it!
> the rational of us in SD regret it!
Both of you?
The three of us rational folks in your neighboring state to the south east feel for you.
Eh, every state has problematic assholes.
Statuary Hall has a statue from every state in it. My state, NC, currently has a white supremacist in Statuary Hall.
But don't you worry! NC is replacing the white supremacist's statue with...Billy Graham.
.... Oh, great. Well, yay for being a national embarrassment. We've also got Maya Angelou living here, while Nicholas Sparks and David Sedaris are both best selling authors... We have a whole bunch of Nobel prize winners and three astronauts, including Dr. Ronald Ervin McNair, who died in the space shuttle *Challenger* accident.
This is all fake. Everyone knows that DeezNutz won
I voted for DeezNutz twice.
One man, two votes.
One man, two nuts
Two nuts to one vote. Then another vote 15 minutes later. Then maybe after an hour. After that? Get a sports drink and we'll see how the afternoon turns out.
Could you do 30?
Hell I vote for him every day.
ha, got eeem
I voted for Deez nuts on behalf of every one of my dead relatives. Even the ones deceased before I was born :)
He had my vote
If the hell this dude believes in is indeed real, this fucker is gonna burn for eternity. Committed his life after crack to lying his ass off all day every day about the foundation of our democracy.
I hate that guy.
His life after crack is now again a life with crack lol
Satan: so you gave up crack to support a guy who has a special place here with us. Look over there, a shrine to trump. Now, be on your way, you have to eat his shit while also shitting on him.
Lindell: but all I did was be a good christian and follow what I thought the Bible meant!
Satan: thats what you get for not reading it! Off you go!
Donald Trump won all 55 states. Yep, s’true!
Including Airstrip One!
thank god for those brave Bostonians back in the War of Independence who sacrificed everything keeping Airstrip One away form the invading British.
Idk the rythm the us election goes but if your computer is getting overwhelmed by recording a D instead of an R every 2-3 minutes... I think your computer has less power than the calculator watch i had in 4th grade.
Love how these voting machines were programmed to switch votes, but suddenly the machines didn't switch votes.
Sophisticated enough to steal an election
Too dumb to hide it
Welcome to the Deep State™
Ah they've upgraded from a fake election map to
The ramblings of a (supposedly ex) crackhead as their proof that he won I see I see.
And, as I will say this until the day I die, ah yes the modern Republican stronghold of
I hope he gets his literal pants sued off of him.
Hasn't he already by Dominion?
If he thinks that a Republican won in MA and VT, he’s on drugs. Oh wait. I hope he’s not back on drugs.
I think it's quite possible he's not on drugs. Trump is his new drug, It's like recovering addicts getting really into Christianity, to the point where the most ardent evangelical missionary would be like "tone it down bro."
Brian "Head" Welch of Korn has recently acknowledged that he did the OD-on-Jesus thing after he got clean. It's real. There's no believer like a new believer.
I don't think he ever quit the drugs.
Machines were overwhelmed because they had too much votes to change!
Idk what computer they use caus i can change about 400 000 entries in an SQL database in about 10 seconds on a macbook pro.
The fact a machine in their world can be overwhelmed when switching an R to a D every 5 minutes shows they have no clue wtf they are talking about.
"The computers were overwhelmed flipping a 0 to a 1! Never before had computers had to do over a hundred million operations across several hours!"
You jest but over in /r/conservative there's still several posts a day about "Look At What Was Just Discovered in Arizona!" type stuff. Then half the comments are "guys we really need to stop doing this we look insane" and the other half are "I knew it! How could Biden have gotten *more* votes but won *fewer* counties!"
The latter is hilarious /r/peopleliveincities material but the whole situation is mostly horrifying in the context of trying to move forward as a country.
Even with fake numbers Trump can't carry his home state 😂
Oh, Trump won California? Ok 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
“The machines were overwhelmed”
How does this slapdick think voting machines work? Does he think they talk to each other and say “OMG so many Trump votes what should we do?!?”
Exactly right! A machine doesn't care what column you are putting the total numbers into, it counts them the same. There is no way to be "overwhelmed"
Imagine thinking that Trump not only won 49 states, but that one of the states he won was CALIFORNIA.
How fucking stupid are these people?!
It's horrifying that there are people who believe this nonsense.
And people so dumb they voted for Trump in the first place and thought he did a good job.
Mental illness is a hell of a drug.
Although I hear Mike Lindell prefers meth.
Crack sprinkled with that Walter White blue sky meth.
That's how he invented the shitty pillow, crackheads aren't known for being picky about what they sleep on.
To get those numbers? Definitely meth.
Yes and it would've been more believable
Are you telling me Democrats managed to manipulate all voting machines without leaving any trace, while Republicans didn't even manage to book the correct 4 seasons?
Can we get Mr. Lindell to sign an affidavit to this effect under penalty of perjury?
Just need to lure him in with a 5 o'clock free crack giveaway.
Can I be president for like a month so I can make things like unnecessary capitalization punishable by life in federal prison? Maybe I’m just getting old and grumpy but I feel like people’s grasp of the English language has gotten MUCH worse in the last 5 years or so.
Hey, what the fuck. If you're going to lie, lie big. Did Hitler teach us nothing?
Oh yeah. Turns out he taught Republicans quite a lot.
Did he honestly post this? Where? Unbelievable how stupid he must be
Dominion needs to sue the pillow fuck into a life time of poverty.
You can almost hear him chaffing his palms.
The fact that they believe a Republican winning states like California or Washington is a realistic outcome is hilarious.
I think his pillows are giving off noxious fumes that rot your brain.
I wonder at what point Trump realized Mr Pillow’s crazier than a shithouse rat. Like, I’m picturing him nodding along for a while and then it slowly dawning on him that he’s been agreeing with a crackhead for half an hour or whatever.
Especially for Trump, who is SO concerned about being embarrassed and humiliated, that just has to have been the worst feeling lol.
>the Joe won New York
Are we calling Biden "The Joe" now?
Fucking insane. They’re all fucking insane.
This guy needs psychiatric help desperately.
It’s been pretty clear for several months now, that he’s gone well beyond the “grift” and bought fully into this delusional madness. He believes absolutely anything he sees that confirms what he wants to be true.
There was a time not long ago at all, when this level of obvious delusion would be enough proof to have someone committed for a psychological review and his family should probably look into transferring power-of-attorney to someone who will prevent him from pissing away his company and hurting employees, business partners/suppliers, and investors (if any).
Trump didn't even have over a 50% approval the entire time he was president. Do they expect people to believe everyone just changed their mind come election day?
Oh yeah Mike? Well, I have excellent sources that say that **I** got 100 trillion votes in the election. And anyone who says otherwise is a cuck, liar, and probably a lizard person. So I automatically win! Fuck you. Fuck Trump. And fuck Biden. I am the president of the universe and you and everyone else has to worship me until the end of time!
That's how this all works right?
To be fair, this man does smoke rocks
It's quite interesting that they always *say* they have confirmation or proof but never show anything, it's all just their word. It's as if their base is made of people who have been raised to accept the word of a figurehead or middleman to a figure head without questioning the validity of the statements made. American religious indoctrination is a boon for conservative politicians and their 'pastors'.
that's cool mike hey have you tried weed instead of coke
> ~~Trump~~ The shitgibbon won every state
He won california, huh? Good to know.
This motherfucker needs to be shut down before he incites another insurrection attempt. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm tired of his cracked out (if you think he isn't still using, you're as dumb as a shitstain lemming) mouth running wild.
Don't forget deep red Vermont, everyone knows they would never vote blue.
As he sets down the crack pipe and blows out a puff of smoke......
You'll have the chance to present that before a judge, Pillow dude